How does memory shape the "self"?

In my own opinion, memories defined ourselves in a way that provides us mediums that could make a connection with others or the world. When know there are others that are existing in the world we will find out how they are different from us, at the same time, we know our “self”. The memories of our past help us to remind who we are, maybe happy memories with your friends, maybe a trauma in your childhood, maybe the first day of school… All of those are personal to us, while we recall those memories, we know those memories belong to us because we are always the main character in those memories. Memories could also teach us lessons from our past which could let us improve to a better “self”, for example, I break a plate and my mother hit me with a stick. After that “punishment” we will be fear about that stick whenever we see it and we will remember the reason why we were hit by that stick, whilst, we will prevent making mistake and being more careful. Furthermore, memories are piecemeal because most of us could not remember everything in our life, however, sometimes we are the one who chooses what we want to remember and this behave defined “self”, after that the memories that we choose will shape our personality, social standard, character…in this world because they support our values, perspective and how we viewed about this world based on the experience that we encountered before.